If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
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I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
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I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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