we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize