with your own penis?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
