Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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