Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
