this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
