You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
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he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
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I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
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