Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
