Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I pour the whiskey from now on
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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