It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
There r osticjed everywhere
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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