driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
