just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize