Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Holy shit dude........stairs
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
