The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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