would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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