Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
