My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
