I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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