it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
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