I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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