There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
