My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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