No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
either way he was missing a nipple.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
