You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
