Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
