Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I need moral support for this bender
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
