White coat. Heels.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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