he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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