just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
