I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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