he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
