Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
