whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
