ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
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