Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
