This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Randomize