Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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