you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!