Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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