The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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