I am in a vortex of obligation.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
