why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
