my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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