i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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