the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize