she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
