I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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