I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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