If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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