Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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