please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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